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Joke of the Day

"[Opens a beer at the park] ""Dude. There's kids here."" Oh shit how rude of me. [turns] IF YOU KIDS WANT SOME BEERS THEYRE IN THE COOLER"

"A beautiful woman approaches a man in a bar... A beautiful woman approaches a man in a bar and says, ""hey, big boy. You single?"" He says, ""yeah! How'd you know?"" ""You're fucking ugly, for starters."""

"why is math book so sad? it has many problems..."

"Why was the blonde staring at the box of orange juice for a long time? because it said ""CONCENTRATE"""

"Why did the referee blow his whistle at the leper hockey game? There was a face off at centre ice."

"If you want your wife or girlfriend to listen and pay undivided attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep."

"What's yellow and always points to the north? A magnetic banana."

"""Wish You Were Beer!"" Wait...no...that's right...send."

"I think it's so brave that Rosie O' Donnell is openly fat"

"Some people say I'm apathetic but I don't care what anyone thinks."