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Joke of the Day

"Yo, Hillary, I'm really happy for you, and I'ma let you finish... ...but the World Trade Centre had one of the best collapses of all time! One of the best collapses of all time!"

"Subway: When you pay to eat fresh Just like Jared"

"Have you guys heard about the corduroy pillows? There making head lines. (classic) Edit: goddammit...they're"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Amber ! Amber who ? Amber-sting to come in !"

"They tried to make me go to rehab, and I said ""My HMO doesn't cover residential treatment."""

"God...= I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness."

"[Knock knock] Who's there? Allah. Allah who? #***ALLAHU AKBAR*** [everything explodes]"

"The Chicken or The Egg A chicken and an egg are laying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette. The egg rolls over in satisfaction and says, ""Well, I guess we answered that question."""

"A general tweet to those who attack me but I miss because they're blocked: I'm totally gutted. Well done. You're fierce! You got me GOOD."

"What kind of venereal disease does a Stormtrooper get? An AT-STD."