65611
Joke of the Day
"*Breaking news* The inventor of the anagram has died may he 'erect a penis'."
Next Joke
"Procrastination is like masturbation It awesome until you realize that you've fucked yourself."
"Wife: [holding old dog] I thought you took care of this yesterday Stormtrooper husband: *looks out back to see gun marks all over the yard*"
"Apparently I snore so loudly that I scare everyone in the car I'm driving."
"I like my women like I like my coffee... Ground up and in the freezer"
"So a grasshopper walks into a bar... The bartender says, ""Hey we have a drink named after you!"" The grasshopper replies, ""You have a drink named Steve?"" favorite corny joke"
"Ordering at Chipotle: ""With white rice."" ""Brown?"" ""No, white. And chicken."" ""Steak?"" ""No, chicken. And medium salsa."" ""Mild?"" ""No, medium."""
"I don't suffer insomnia like most tweeters do. I always get a solid 7, maybe 8 minutes of sleep every night."
"Trump wants to pass a law banning grocery stores from selling shredded cheese... ... in order to ""make America Grate again"""
"How many nice guys does it take to screw a lightbulb? 0 cause they'll compliment it then get pissed off when it won't screw"