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Joke of the Day

"Why didn't Hannibal Lecter have any friends as a kid? He was told not to play with his food."

"Jesus loves you, but Zeus thinks you're stupid."

"I came up with the next musical fusion: Reggae and K-pop... I call it Ganja Style"

"People ask me where I see myself in 5 years. I don't know. I don't have 2020 vision."

"Why didn't the Christmas Cake go to the dance? He had his raisins..."

"I promise to never take you for granted... unless we are shopping for counter tops."

"My childhood joke Teacher: Why are you late? Student: Because of the sign on the road. Teacher: What type of sign? Student: The sign that says, ""School Ahead, Go Slow.""!"

"I'm very good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet... I don't know why."

"What is a SJW's least favorite element on the periodic table? Helium."

"I don't have ""safe sex"" ... ... because I have never been turned on by anything with a combination lock."