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Joke of the Day

"*eats way too much delicious space pudding* Me: Oof I am STUFFED! What'd you call this again? Alien Chef: OH MY GOD YOU ATE MY GRANDMOTHER!"

"Two blondes were walking in a park ...when one of them said: ""Look, a dead bird!"" The other one looked up in the sky and asked ""where?"""

"Boo ""Knock Knock!"" ""Who's there?"" ""Boo!"" ""Boo who?"" ""Geez, no need to cry, it's just a joke."""

"Say what you want about deaf people... Am I right!?"

"What did the mama pig say to her bad little piglet? ""Behave or Frankenswine will get you."""

"When I stayed over at my girlfriend's house, her extremely conservative father wouldn't let us sleep together. Which was a shame, because he is very attractive."

"I wonder what my parents did to fight boredom before the internet I asked my 17 brothers and sisters and they didn't know either."

"How many pregnant women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one. She holds it while the world revolves around her."

"Being a parent means often saying your child is shy rather than ""he sees how creepy u are, that's why he doesn't want to shake your hand""."

"I put my pants on one leg at a time, just like you. But sometimes I put both my legs in the same pant leg and pretend I'm a mermaid."