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Joke of the Day
"It's scary living in Massachusetts... Every time I watch the news I hear about Mass shootings."
Next Joke
"And Jesus said unto Peter, ""Come forth and you shall receive eternal glory"" But Peter came fifth, and won only a toaster."
"What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Poop. There, you happy?"
"Summer was especially good this year in Canada... If I recall correctly it was a friday"
"A walk in the woods helps me relax and release tension. The fact that I'm dragging a body behind me should be irrelevant"
"Some people like to stir the pot... ...I prefer to smoke it."
"It was Beethoven's 245th birthday yesterday. Of course, that's only 35 in human years "
"When I call you Hun, it's short for Atilla."
"What's dumber than a box of rocks? The hippie carrying it. What's dumber than that? The yuppie buying it. What's dumber than that? The box of rocks"
"My spirit animal is a tapeworm."