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Joke of the Day

"What's dumber than a box of rocks? The hippie carrying it. What's dumber than that? The yuppie buying it. What's dumber than that? The box of rocks"

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"A. 34 Q. How many seconds can I watch a BRILLIANT, ADDICTIVE, SMART television show before checking the internet?"
"F*&%. I keep forgetting the Titans"
"Q: What's musical and handy in a supermarket? A: A Chopin Liszt."
"Is that a gun in your pocket or are you happy to see me? Both! Now get in the fucking van."
"Accidentally switched the baby formula with coconut milk and now my newborn is complaining that her lullabies are ""too mainstream."""
"I like my coffee like I like my slaves free"
"Funny how things change with time, I used to hate spankings.."
"I hope I get a good grade on my kids science project this year."
"A man is applying for the LAPD and the inspector says: ""Got you! You thought this was going to be a repost!"""
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