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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a politician and a catfish? One's a bottom-dwelling, muck-sucker and the other is a fish."

"Word of the Day: Eskihoe A girl that wears UGG boots and a miniskirt at the same time."

"Girls giving blowjobs for Louboutins - Whatcha call that? Head over heels."

"I just saw an honest political leader, riding a unicorn."

"What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant praying mantis."

"Everyone is telling others how to vote via Face Book. and all I can think is how I just watched Bob Ross paint this whole thing and explain every step but I still don't get how he did it."

"4: Where did I come from? Me: Mommy's belly. 4: How'd I get there? Me: I, uh...put you there? 4: How did you... Me: WHO WANTS ICE CREAM?!"

"Just had a 10 minute argument about the importance wearing pants in public with a 5yo She won, today I wear pants when I take her to school"

"Why do they call it PMSing? Mad Cow disease was already taken."

"Why does my computer always ask me if I'm ""sure"" about stuff? Yes, I want to delete my hard drive."