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Joke of the Day
"What does an accountant call a friend's birthday party? (x-post from /r/tax) A present liability!"
Next Joke
"Your life may be an open book, but could you skip to the good parts."
"Did you guys hear about the circus fire? It was in tents."
"What's the maximum velocity while having sex? 68, cause at 69 you flip over"
"What do you call a james bond film about a calculator? Casio royale"
"I really wanted my kid to be a kid so I gave birth directly into the ball pit at Chuck E. Cheese's."
"My inability to proofread increases by 1000% after I press send. Danmit"
"They say that every 2 out of 3 people live next to a pedophile Not me, I live next to 2 smoking hot 10 year olds"
"Blonde girl changes her name She goes to the local court for it. Girl: I am tired of people calling me Pussy Galore. Judge: What do you want to change it to? Girl: Pussy McNamara."
"What is Michelle obama's favorite vegetable? BARACK-OLI"