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Joke of the Day

"Blonde girl changes her name She goes to the local court for it. Girl: I am tired of people calling me Pussy Galore. Judge: What do you want to change it to? Girl: Pussy McNamara."

"Did you hear the one about the dyslexic philosopher with insomnia? He was up all night wondering if there really is a dog. I know it's a dad joke, because it was my dad's favorite joke."

"Why did Snoop Dogg get arrested? Embezzlement"

"What's Forrest gumps password? 1forrest1"

"How come when someone goes to sit down and the seat is dirty they use their hand to wipe the seat then wipe their dirty hands on their pants? What was the point"

"The Home Alone house is up for sale for 2.4 mil. I'd pay 2.5 (if I had it) just so I could say, ""Keep the change you filthy animal."""

"i was reading a story about a proctologist... It hit pretty deep."

"Why did Florence Welch sing 'Sweet Nothing'? Because she was out of lemo-nada. It's okay guys, i'll let myself out..."

"Why did two ferrets decide to meet? They were trying to start a business."

"Why are pirates never scared of a storm? Because they love torrents."