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Joke of the Day
"Favorite lame DAD joke"
Next Joke
"Guns don't kill people. Wars and famine and disease and random accidents kill people. Also, sometimes guns. Have a good day!"
"Help me Obi Wan Kenobi. You're my only Never mind. Batman's here."
"I just want to apologize to all the guys I dated BEFORE I started using Prozac. And to their wives. And their local fire departments."
"What's a ghost's favorite sexual fetish? Boo-kake"
"What's a Frenchmen's favorite vacation? A retreat."
"""zombies aren't real zombies aren't real zombies aren't real zombies aren't real"" - me, walking my dog at night"
"What car transmission do Mexicans use? Manuel."
"Boy 1: ""How did you get that bruise on your arm?"" Boy 2: ""I ate some Easter candy."" Boy 1: ""Eating Easter candy won't give you a bruise."" Boy 2: ""It will if it's your big brother's candy!"""
"How does an apple a day keep the doctor away? When you take careful aim."