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Joke of the Day

"I like mixing laxatives and nitrous oxide on a regular basis, but it's OK... ...I only do it for shits and giggles."

"When is carotene going to get out of beta mode?"

"An Atheist, a Crossfiter, and a Vegan walk into a bar... how do I know? Because everyone repost this joke everytime!"

"How many Sand People does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No one knows. They ride single file to hide their numbers."

"A man visits the doctor... ...who says to him ""*Okay, Sir, I think you're going to have to stop masterbating""* *""But why, Doc?*"" the man replies. ""*Because this is the waiting room*""."

"I used to have Osama Bin Laden as a contact. I removed him because he was blowing up my phone. Oh god this that was so shitty."

"My wife and I weren't really expecting a baby, and then BAM!... One smacks right into the windshield."

"guy: my dog just died girl who studied abroad: wow that reminds of this one time in Europe i saw a dog"

"Why is the ice planet in Star Wars called ""Hoth""...? ...shouldn't it be ""Coldth""?"

"I hate when people tell me to have a safe flight. Like I have a choice. It's either back home, or in a swamp. I'll try really hard to live."