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Joke of the Day

"The constant challenge of modern relationships: how to prove more interesting than the other's smartphone."

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"What do you call a monster with two wooden heads? Edward Woodward."
"""ENTER PASSWORD"" *types 'snowflake'* ""RE-ENTER PASSWORD"" *types 'snowflake'* ""ERROR. PASSWORDS MUST BE IDENTICAL""."
"Q: What's green, and sings? A: Elvis Parsley"
"I think my intelligence is beyond of an average human I just finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months, and at the back of the box it says 2-4 years"
"Why can't you have military coup in Russia? Because in Russia the military coups you."
"What are 3 things a black man can't get? A fat lip, a black eye, and a job."
"Before having a kid the most important thing to ask yourself is ""Am I ready to watch the exact same cartoon on repeat for the next 4 years?"""
"Why do we live in a society where pizza arrives faster than police do? Because the pizza guy has consequences for not doing his job correctly. ""Oh damn, shots fired!"" But not by the pizza guy."
"What is an injured persons favorite movie? Cast Away"
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