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Joke of the Day

"I think every joke should have a serious element of Fe-y"

"*buys extra movie ticket seat so I'll have a place to put my microwave bc I'll be damned if I'm paying that much for popcorn"

"*writes employment history on arm *writes professional references on thigh *writes email address on neck *adds ""resume"" to resume"

"I was accused of sexual harassment But I couldn't of. Because her ass meant nothing to me."

"Stop! This is not funny! My dad died in 9/11, his last words were Allah wakbar"

"Yes It Is Is Time Travel Possible ?"

"What's a pedophile's favorite musical key? A minor Hahahahahaha I'm making music flashcards and I'm soooo bored :/"

"Just got an email from dominoes said ""easy and delicious"" they sure know how to talk to a single guy!"

"You're right, vegetarian. Meat IS murder. ...and I'm sure no bunnies, squirrels or mice died during the harvesting of your garden salad."

"Report: Underpaid bowling alley employees to go on strike."