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Joke of the Day

"A husband and wife go out to eat And the waitress asks ""would you like any condiments?"" They simultaneously reply ""no thanks, we're married"""

"Drake Bell needs to call his child Taco."

"Love me sister, I incest."

"What do an alcoholic and a necrophiliac have in common? They both like to pop open a nice cold one."

"I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus. Then he put a black rubber ball in her mouth with a strap around her head I'm just telling you what I saw"

"How can you tell Sofia Vergara's children on the playground? They're the ones with stretch marks on their lips."

"Why couldn't the skeleton go to the prom? Because he was fat and ugly and no one liked him"

"What's the difference between your wife and your job? After five years, your job will still suck."

"Reception Did you hear about the two antennas that got married? The wedding sucked! But, the reception was AWESOME!"

"Dad, why is my cousin called Porsche? Dad: Because her father likes Porsche cars. Son: Thanks dad. Dad: You're welcomed, young boy."