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Joke of the Day

"Which is faster to unload, a truckload of bricks or a truckload of dead kittens? Dead kittens. Can't get a pitchfork into the bricks."

"Me: I wouldn't miss it for the world. Friend: It was yesterday."

"I tried to read through Dante's Inferno once, but it was dry as hell."

"Why does my shampoo smell like gasoline? And when did my wife start smoking?"

"@NBCSports thank you for making the sports"

"what did the infant cannibal think of the premature section of the nursing ward it was a preemie-yum buffet"

"What are the worst six years in a blonde's life? Third Grade!"

"What should you do if you see an epileptic having a seizure in a bathtub? Throw in a load of laundry, and soap"

"I'd tell my neighbor about the weird smell coming from her apartment, but she's been so quiet that I don't want to disturb her."

"one of my friends told me she's pregnant 10 weeks and 9 days pregnant."