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Joke of the Day

"Teacher: You have the same mistakes as the person next to you, how could that happen? Me: We have the same teacher."

"Swimming is good for you. Especially if you are drowning."

"So a baby is named by his French, Chinese, and Redditor grandparents A. L'Mao"

"If 80s movies taught me anything, it's that anyone with a sweater tied around their shoulders is a villain"

"Was glancing through the Obituaries this morning and found it really creepy that all these people managed to die in alphabetical order."

"Did you know you can use voice-to-text on Twitter so this tweet came from my mouth and also stop staring at me people on this bus."

"What does an Engineer use for contraception? His personality!"

"Why was hitler's suicide such a suprise? Because we did nazi it coming"

"How did the dog feel when he lost his flashlight? Delighted."

"So, a man with a baby newt on his head walks into a barber's... And says, ""Short back and sides, axolotl off the top."""