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Joke of the Day

"Why did the run-on sentence get worried? Her period came late."

"According to my neighbor's journal, I have ""boundary isues."""

"captain: enemy sub approaching, activate the sauna 1st mate: dont you mean sonar captain (already in towel): full steam ahead"

"After failing my first 2 exams, I just got an A on my third Anatomy exam... the answers were inside me the entire time"

"Tip for new parents: The less you feed 'em, the less they poop."

"Drunkenly changed my voicemail to ""if you like cheese, press 2. Para Spanish, press cheese. To hear more cheeses, say goooo-DA"""

"What do you call a trip to Spain gone horribly wrong? A Spain in the ass."

"You had me at ""we've got the place surrounded"""

"Why can you only date girls named Ana?... ...because I got a tattoo that says Ana"

"What is the most popular bank in Wales? Welsh Fargo... ...gramps made me do it."