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Joke of the Day

"Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere."

"What's a pirate's favorite firework? M80"

"*sees guy having a heart attack* me: quick somebody push a cookie in his mouth! person: isn't that for diabetics? me: it's what I would want"

"Q: What's E.T. short for? A: So he can fit in his space ship."

"How did the nucleus escape from prison? Through the cell wall. I'm sorry. This was just too wonderful to resist sharing."

"Womens are crazy And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid."

"I have invented a revolutionary drug that can cure third-world hunger... Just take one little pill with a meal 3x per day."

"How many Lutherans does it take to change a lightbulb? Change? Why do we need change? (It's cool, I go to a Lutheran church)"

"I've been researching some useless facts... Want some examples? I have found out that there are over 10,000 different types of lice. And that's just off the top of my head."

"What's the worst thing to say to a friend you see on a plane? Hi Jack!"