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Joke of the Day

"How did the nucleus escape from prison? Through the cell wall. I'm sorry. This was just too wonderful to resist sharing."

"Jenner is a hero, and quite frankly saved some lives Had I not replaced the Jenner in my truck last week I wouldnt have been able to shift into neutral when my accelerator stuck today."

"If you don't have your Florida ID with you on voting day, you can always show them a photo of yourself wearing a tank top to a funeral."

"What do you call an alligator in a vest? An IN-VEST-IGATOR!"

"How did one goldfish get the attention of another goldfish? He yelled, ""A u, fish!"""

"My friend was really worried when he had to get tested for HIV. I told him just think positive."

"I've been told I look like a young Denzel Washington's white neighbor."

"What's brown and sticky? A twig."

"Whats the first word a swede says after its born? wouaaa wouaaa wu wu welcome refugees"

"Broke up with my girlfriend today On the other hand I met this chick."