51775

Joke of the Day

"Three ways to get something done Do it yourself, hire someone, or forbid your kids to do it."

"A ceiling fan wont cut a bagel in half, not even on top speed"

"Lil' Wayne looks pretty good for a scarecrow that is being eaten from the inside out by bats."

"How do you make Manischewitz Wine? Kick him in the nuts."

"How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Just kidding, feminists don't change anything"

"I've always wondered why baseball was getting bigger ...and then it hit me"

"Me: *passes ransom note* Mom: 2 bags of unmarked cookies? Me: Or you'll never see the cat alive! Mom: He's behind you. Me: STUPID KITTY!"

"What did Jay-Z call Beyonce after they got engaged? Fiancee."

"Maybe I have a bunny in my pants, maybe that's why I'm putting this salad in my pockets, you don't know me."

"What do you call a door with no legs? A door."