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Joke of the Day
"Don't fall in love. You will get feelings and die."
Next Joke
"What if the Bad News Bears literally gave you bad news? Bear 1: You're adopted Bear 2: The cancer is terminal Bear 3: This tweet ain't funny"
"What did the Redditor say at his wedding? TIL death do us part."
"I hear an important member of Jehovah's Witness died He's knocking on heaven's door"
"What's the difference between 9/11 and a cow? Americans can't milk a cow for 15 years."
"Diamonds aren't a girl's best friend. Perfectly regulated office temperatures are a girl's best friend."
"Let's spend the rest of our next 5 to 7 years together."
"Why don't white girls like trigonometry? Because secant even."
"""You never tell me you love me,"" said my girlfriend. I said, ""That's because you never ask."" She said, ""Do you want me to?"" ""Go for it,"" I replied. She said, ""Do you love me?"" I said, ""No."""
"We have a young married couple in the neighborhood who are truly inseparable. Last week it took four Howard County Policemen and a dog."