51389

Joke of the Day

"H:""Where'd you get those shoes?"" Me:""I've had these for years. Is that a new grill I saw?"" H:""Nope just cleaned the old one"" *Marriage lies"

"It turns out smoking prevents Alzheimers. You don't live long enough to develop it."

"It's sad that the only thing great about my job is that my chair spins -__-"

"8th Harry Potter book confirmed, you'll never believe who wrote it... J.K."

"""Playing hard to get huh?"" I say as I flip through your wedding photos on facebook."

"What's the difference between your mom and a rooster? A rooster says ""Cock-a-doddle-doo"", and your mom says ""Any-cock-will-do!"""

"Coup attempt on Turkey from the rear Did Greece help?"

"I'm working out again in hopes that I can wear my superhero shirt in public without someone saying, ""Batman really let himself go""."

"Why does Tiger Woods bring two pair of pants during a golf game? Its in case he gets a hole-in-one."

"A man walks into a zoo but there was only a dog in it. It was a shitzu."