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Joke of the Day
"What is ""Mary"" short for? She has no legs!"
Next Joke
"What's Scoobys birthstone? Ruuuubbbby?"
"TIFU by Playing a joke on every redditor who clicked on this thread"
"Why did the Canadian DJ turn down the gig at the local Y? Because why emcee, eh?"
"Me: Push! Grandkids: But, you're heavy. Me: What did the sign say? Grandkids: No children in shopping cart :(( Me: Rules are rules."
"What haircut did the Texan barber recommend when asked? He couldn't think of anything, and said ""I'll mullet over"""
"I wrote a book It's called Oceans 2: The Seaquel"
"My favourite machine at the gym is the television."
"I can tell when two words go together well to define a new thing. I call it portmantuition."
"Me: This chicken is undercooked. Wife: You don't appreciate my cooking. Me: I think the vet could save it if it we took it right now."