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Joke of the Day
"I wrote a book It's called Oceans 2: The Seaquel"
Next Joke
"A man can survive up to two weeks without water, around forty days without food, and about one hour without touching his junk."
"What do gay horses eat? Cock"
"I went to a nice Cuban restaurant last night, I say restaurant but it was more of a Castro pub."
"What's a white racist's favorite food? Klan Chowder"
"With trump being a potential candidate I feel like the Simpsons are sitting on their couch watching an episode of us"
"[Interview] ""Do you have any previous experience dealing with animals?"" [flashback to my flatmate leaving toast crumbs in the butter] ..Yes."
"Bad news: I got so busy drafting tweets, I forgot to pick the kids up at school. Worse news: I'm a bus driver"
"There's literally no way to know how many chameleons are in your house"
"Sleeping in central park Is it going too far to equate my experience sleeping in central park to being a Jewish person in nazi germany..."