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Joke of the Day
"My wife's starsign was cancer, which makes how she died pretty ironic. Attacked by a giant crab."
Next Joke
"Every time I don't clog a toilet I feel like I've gotten away with something"
"Why could Donald Trump never be a Lannister? Because he never pays his debts."
"Hi, my name is Kate. I am 12 and I am still a virgin... does that mean my dad is gay?"
"Why do Jewish men get circumcised ? Cause Jewish women won't touch anything that's not 10% off."
"Me texting friend: Hey! What's up? Buddy: *sends picture of ceiling* Me: I am so glad I didn't ask ""how's it hanging"""
"*whispers to dog wearing a 'working dog, do not pet' vest* psst what time does your shift end?"
"Yo' mamma is so dumb.... ... She put a ruler on the side of her bed to see how long she slept."
"Amazon Prime Day"
"When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body. Men are so polite they only look at the covered parts."