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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a broken fisherman's calculator. Something fishy that doesn't quite add up."

"Me: Hi. I can't take your call right now but please leave a message. CW: I'm standing right in front of yo... Me: BEEEEEEEEEEEEP"

"What is large and grey and shoots tourists in Africa? An elefanatic, of course."

"Did you hear about the blind dog that never got lost? It really nose it's way around."

"What's the difference between a guitar player and a savings bond? Eventually the savings bond will mature and begin to earn money."

"What do you call a horse that has been kicked out of his house? Unstable"

"How did Dairy Queen wind up pregnant? Burger King didn't wrap his Whopper"

"Carl: Perfect weather tonight. Me: Tell me something I don't know. Carl: Butterflies taste with their feet. Me: Fair enough."

"How do you piss off an animal rights activist? You eat pita bread."

"Two silk worms were in a race. They ended up in a tie."