48185

Joke of the Day

"I think it's unfair that when a human eats uncooked fish it's ""sushi,"" but when a fish eats uncooked human, it's ""a shark attack."""

"In movies when people go underwater, I like to hold my breath and see if I would survive in that situation. I died in Finding Nemo."

"What do you do when a feminist, anti-feminist and meninist cross paths? Triggernometry."

"Politicians should be limited to two terms... One in office and one in prison. [Credit](http://www.reddit.com/r/news/comments/2jxula/alabama_state_house_speaker_indicted_on/clg2hjl)"

"You know what they say about killing bees... It's a real buzzkill."

"If you don't order beef for dinner... That's a missed steak."

"Lord of the Rings: A Shortened Version -Give me the ring. -No."

"Where does a pirate go on vacation? Arrrrrland."

"adopted son son: mom i am 100% sure i am adopted, you do not Love me. mom: if we have had adopted a child, we would have adopted the one with better face."

"What's the difference between a fish and a mountain goat? Fish muck about in fountains..."