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Joke of the Day

"adopted son son: mom i am 100% sure i am adopted, you do not Love me. mom: if we have had adopted a child, we would have adopted the one with better face."

"Just came up with.. Q: How do pirates like their jigsaws? A: In pieces of eight."

"What's the difference between jam and jelly? I can't jelly my dick into your asshole."

"A techno song lasted longer than my first marriage"

"I can count on one hand the number of times I've visited Chernobyl... it's 14"

"What is the title of the Japanese version of ""When Harry Met Sally"" (wait for it ... wait for it ...) ""When Hally Met Sarry"" Ahhh - don't you feel better now?"

"Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One says to the other ""Pass the soap."" The other says. ""Ice cream doesn't have bones."""

"Whenever I tell her that I want to put my Butterfinger into her MilkyWay, she Snickers."

"I hate when people ask what I hope to be doing in 5 years time I mean come on, I don't have 2020 vision"

"Did you hear the guitarist who got in trouble? He was fingering a G string but didn't notice it was A minor."