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Joke of the Day

"50 Cent used to be 1 Dollar... But now he's only half the man he was."

"LPT: To baby-proof your home: put your front doorknob like 4 feet off the ground so the babies can't reach it. Then those fuckers won't get in!"

"what's the difference between time and ronaldo? time passes"

"What do you call a russian bull? a moscow"

"Another knock knock joke I can tell knock knock jokes to my dog because when I say ""Knock, knock."" He starts barking and runs to the door... Stupid dog ! There's never anyone !!!"

"Our local cinema is putting on a screening of the new James Bond film especially for dyslexics. Respect"

"How do you get 1000 dead babies into the bed of a pickup truck? A blender! How do you get them out? Nacho chips!"

"There are 2 things I love about women... Tits"

"Why did the chicken cross the road? To push Jake off a cliff.... he really hates Jake. as told by my 6 year old who hates a kid named Jake."

"IF attacked by Clowns ... Go for the Juggler!"