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Joke of the Day

"Wives are like hurricanes They're wet and wild to begin with, but when they leave they take everything"

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"How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a swimming pool."
"What does an asylum have in common with a squirrel's house? They're both used to store nuts."
"what is the height of trust? two cannibals in a 69"
"""Contact Us"" Oh yeah, I'm gonna contact the shit out of you"
"KANYE: I made Taylor Swift famous TRUMP: We should ban all Muslims KANYE: BILL COSBY INNOCENT TRUMP: THE POPE SUCKS KANYE: damn ur good"
"July 4th celebrates the original Brexit. Thanks George"
"It took me 13 years but I finally deleted most of my e-mails."
"Which unit describes the intensity of light in South Africa? Nelson Candela"
"I bought a metal detector. Beach better have my money."