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Joke of the Day
"I lost 189 lbs in one week. By getting a divorce."
Next Joke
"How do dogs like to have sex? RUFF!"
"A tornado is about 5 minutes away and our satellite is out. I hope our house lands somewhere where the cable works!"
"Don't hate every single one of your friends yet? Get Facebook."
"So I told my girlfriend that she'd look better with her hair back... Which apparently is a very rude thing to say to a cancer patient."
"""I'm gonna cramp your style."" - Menstruation"
"I just bought a round of shots for everybody, but they're being totally ungrateful and saying they don't even have tetanus."
"Women, when you say: ""We should move into a better house."" A man hears: ""My plan is to force you to work till the day you die."""
"Me: I'm feeling frisky yet stabby. Do you want to come over? Him:... Me: Good answer"
"Who just can't get enough of one liners? Coke addicts."