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Joke of the Day
"Partied so hard last night I spilled Kool-Aide on my cocaine Punchline"
Next Joke
"I've never fucked a poofter, but I've fucked a bloke who has."
"cop: could you please describe the man who tried to kill you me: yeah he was not nice"
"Hey you! Did you lose your nose? I just found it in my business."
"There's something strangely unsettling about the petting zoo selling hamburgers."
"[Jesus on the cross] *texts with 1 hand* ""um dad y hav u 4saken me wtf"" *5 hrs pass* ""new phone. who dis?"""
"Stop making mini snacks, people. Never have I been like, ""wow this is a delicious cupcake. If only it were 1/4 of the size."""
"I had a dream about a woman who becomes a horse at night. It was a nightmare."
"I used to live with my sister. It was really off-putting when I could hear her scream during sex... So I just put my hand over her mouth. ""Shut up, no one is coming to help you."""
"Ran my first 10K this morning. Just kidding I'm on my third donut."