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Joke of the Day

"[Jaws 5] Shia LaBeouf: Wait, is that a real shark? Spielberg: ACTION!!"

"What do you get when two lawyers have sex ? A Binding contract that you can't pull out of ... Edit And their are no loop holes other than your client having piercings."

"Rick Astley will give you any of his pixar movies except one... His SAG preview copy of Inside Out. It would be unethical for him to share that copy while it's still in theaters."

"Why did the blonde call the welfare office? She wanted to know how to cook food stamps!"

"69'd the wife then went to buy donuts after. The guy at the counter said he already knew what I wanted, so I asked how..... He said ""You had 'glazed' all over your face. """

"TIFU by bringing on the wrong player Oops, wrong sub Please^dont^hate^me"

"Hello, you're through to Sea World Your call may be used for training Porpoises."

"How to tell if an orange likes to party Just Invitamin-C."

"""Hi, I'm Justin Timberlake."" *notices that he's actually a large body of salt water, not fresh water* ""Nice try, Mr. Timberocean."""

"What colour T-shirt would win a race? Red, because it runs the most."