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Joke of the Day

"Cop: anything in your pockets that might hurt me? ""Nah"" *cop pulls out a pic of his ex GF and suspect* Cop: *wiping tears* I'm over it"

"[first date] Him: Let's take the stairs! Me: I think we should see other people."

"""I need to get laid man!""nn- eggs (in the chicken)"

"A new book on how to have sex with herbs has finally been published. It's about fucking thyme."

"Give a man a fish Feed him for a day. Give a man a poisoned fish, feed him for the rest of his life."

"Insult me with your BEST, most offensive , crude insults you can think of! Let's see who can make me cry, and rethink continuing living!"

"What happened to Han when Chewie wouldn't do the marathon? He Ran Solo..."

"How much wood can Chuck Norris if Chuck Norris could chuck wood? Chuck Norris would just stare at the wood, and it would chuck itself out of fear."

"What do you get when you cross a monastery with a convent? A cloister fuck, obviously."

"Wanna hear a joke about Kraft Macaroni and Cheese? I would tell you but its dangerously cheesy."