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Joke of the Day

"A new book on how to have sex with herbs has finally been published. It's about fucking thyme."

"How did you quit smoking? Decided to smoke only after sex"

"What do a baby and a pancake have in common? If it s black it ain t good"

"another car tip: once a month, open the hood and rip out one thing. most of the engine is decorative and weighs down your car"

"Jesus said to love your neighbor, but makes no mention about putting up with their music at 3am."

"Here's a joke about North Korea [This post has been removed by the North Korean Government]"

"Opening a gym... Gonna focus on power walking & door knocking. I'll call it ""Jehovah's Fitness"""

"I like my coffee like I like my women... Black and made by my dad."

"Guy comes home with a flower bouquet... ""Guess I'll have to spread my legs now"", says the wife. ""Why? Don't you have a vase?"" the husband replies."

"(x-post from /r/dadjokes) Did you hear about the new ultra-expensive cologne that's for sale? It's called ElonMuskTM"