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Joke of the Day

"What has four legs, two humps, and is given a copy of Metal Gear Solid for their computer? Revolver Camelot!"

"Q: Why did the Wisconsin democrat cry? A: He couldn't recall."

"Kinda wanna eat a jar of peanut butter, kinda wanna nap, kinda wanna punch a stranger. Being a woman is hard."

"To celebrate this Valentine's Day beat your wife... In a friendly race down to the mall."

"How did Jesus stay in such good shape? Cross fit."

"[the followin is based on a true story] *clips of me hittin my shin on my bed every nite for a year* Narrator: its like he forgets its there"

"What do you call a father who was kidnapped in Iraq? A Baghdad."

"What do you call it when Daniel Craig has kinky sex? Bondage!"

"Why did the music student have a piano in the bathroom? Because he was practicing Handel's Water Music."

"Did you hear about the constipated chancellor? He couldn't budge it :P"