33123

Joke of the Day

"The only things that defy gravity are women... ...the heavier they are, the easier they are to pick up."

"What do you suppose broke this window Mr. Holmes? It's a limb entry, my dear Watson!"

"There are going to be a lot of drunk mosquitos tonight."

"What did the spud lover do before it went to bed? It set its alarm for eight -- so it would get a potato clock."

"I just freaked out! I woke up from a nap to find that my phone and wife were missing. It's all good though. I found my phone."

"Whats the difference between jam and jelly? You can't jelly your dick down someones throat."

"[zoo] ME: Haha...this one's face! WIFE: Tha- M [bangs on glass] W: Stop it M [pulls funny face] W [elbows me aside] So sorry, 2 tickets pls"

"A sitar solo so complex and mind melting that the one guy who knows what a sitar is claps"

"""Hey can I do it?"" Anaesthetist: sure, knock yourself out"

"Knock Knock *Knock Knock.* Who's there? *This bagel is for.* This bagel is for who? *Whom. This bagel is for whom.*"