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Joke of the Day

"And then alcohol said ""Put that on facebook, it's hilarious."" But alcohol was wrong. So very wrong."

"My motto in life is always give 100%. Which makes blood donation quite tricky."

"Riding up in the elevator with a bunch of children. So much screaming & crying. You'd think one of them would ask me what the hell's wrong."

"What's another name for a clever duck ? A wise quacker !"

"be careful tonight honey, guys ur age only want one thing.... sports. so b careful not to look too much like sports out there"

"Wanna hear a joke about a broken pencil? Never mind it's pointless. "

"My girl told me she's depressed. Because of her weight, she suffers discrimination. I told her ""Just ignore them. You're bigger than that."""

"Freud was wrong, I have no desire to sleep with my mom I'd bang the shit out of my aunt, though."

"Chuck Norris was what Willis was talkin' about."

"When colleges ask for my leadership activities... ""I'm a mod on reddit."""