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Joke of the Day

"Official Adrian Peterson Joke Thread Submit your best AP jokes and get upvotes. Easy enough, eh?"

"My favourite part about amazingly hot, energetic, passionate sex. Is being able to rewind the tape & watch it again."

"If there's more than one apocalypse, is it apocalypses or apocali? I just want to be ready."

"How do you know when a woman is pregnant? She switches from Ragu to Prego."

"Why did the Boston Marathon runner collapse before finishing the race? (WTF?) His thighs were burning too bad."

"A joke from 1892 ""...one nation, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all."""

"I'm tired of this long distance relationship! Time to move the liquor cabinet to the living room!"

"Did you hear about the new circumcision clinic opening up? I hear the doctors only work for tips."

"What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? Swim!"

"A new study has proven... A new study has proven that people who have more birthdays live longer."