155437

Joke of the Day

"ME (drunkenly picking a fight with a cake): get out my face you jerk CAKE: hey pal you wanna piece of me?!? ME: ok wow now I'm conflicted"

"Why doesn't Smokey the Bear have any children? Because every time his wife gets hot he beats her with a shovel."

"One day, scientists will build a very intelligent supercomputer. ""Is there a god?"", they ask. *** ""There is one now."""

"What did the elephant say to his girlfriend? ""I love you a ton!"""

"What's the sharpest thing in the word? A fart. It goes right through your pants and doesn't leave a hole."

"Of course men aren't above women... But I'd sure like to be on top of you ;)"

"Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand."

"People in sleeping bags are the soft tacos of the bear world."

"Adam hates going out for a meal with God. He always steals his ribs."

"China has a population of a billion people. One billion. That means even if you're a one in a million kind of guy, there are still a thousand others exactly like you."