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Joke of the Day

"I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather But not like the rest of this joke, getting beaten like a dead horse"

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"Why do chat fail always look fake Because they are"
"When somebody said I could never be a ninja I replied, ""Shurikan"""
"I got a new job circumcizing elephants The pay isn't great but the tips are enormous"
"*wakes up from 20 year coma* SHIT, MY TAMOGOTCHI"
"Why is it dangerous for a lawyer to walk onto a construction site when plumbers are working? Because they might connect the drain line to the wrong suer."
"I'm surprised God doesn't make Christian Rock Bands sound better."
"If only women knew that being happy with themselves is the most attractive quality they can ever offer."
"Why did the old lady fall into the well? Because she didn't see that well."
"Two cows are standing next to each other in a field . . . one says "" I was artificially inseminated this morning"" ""I don't believe you."" Said the other ""It's true . no bull. """