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Joke of the Day
"When somebody said I could never be a ninja I replied, ""Shurikan"""
Next Joke
"If she's not ruining your life.....She's just not that into you."
"Q: When Do You Hurt a Midget? When He is standing next to your girlfriend saying her hair smells nice!"
"*Hands girl a card that says Be Mine* Girl: Aw that's so sweet *Pulls out a pickaxe* Me: Come on, do it I need some iron ASAP lady!"
"OMFG there is a horse in the corridor! Then my wife must still be in the manege."
"One time I was so high, my flatscreen fell off the wall and I thought it was just part of the movie."
"Babies are like new tattoos They are yours forever, but you should probably hold off posting pictures for a bit until they aren't raw and weird looking anymore."
"I may make a lot of typos when I text, but in my defense, I do have to look at the road sometimes."
"What's green and red, and goes round and round? A frog in a food blender."
"Why didn't The Cold War happen? Russia kept Stalin it"