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Joke of the Day

"I'm starting a support group for people who think they are mortgages. The most important thing is for them to realize that they are not a loan."

"In America she's called ""Miley"" Cyrus, but in other countries she's called ""What America would be like if it were a person""."

"Which do Catholic priests like betterapples or cherries? Neitherthey prefer boysenberries."

"I know its slightly distasteful but, what's the best way to punish a blind kid? rearrange the furniture"

"Why did Princess Diana cross the road? A: Conservation of momentum. _____ *Also, give me your best dark jokes, I've been out of it a few years and I need to get some new material.*"

"Why do waitresses love serving men in fedoras? If you're nice to them, their tipping intensifies."

"My doctor gave me six months to live. I told him I couldn't pay my bill. He gave me another six months."

"The doctor said I had, at best, a year to live... So I shot him. The judge gave me 30."

"Why was NASA so interested on travelling to Mars? Because it had their Curiosity."

"My roommate said he gets laid ten times more than me. 0x10=0"