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Joke of the Day

"When one door closes, another opens. Also, you can open the closed door. That's how doors work. How do you know so little about doors?"

"Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? He hasn't either"

"Joke Who wants hear a pun about ghosts?"

"""Smells fresh. Like a tropical island."" ""Ok. Now take off the blindfold! Your family's been dead in this car for a week! We Febrezed it!"""

"Just saved a bunch of money on my Glenn from The Walking Dead Halloween costume by not showering for a month."

"Cows are vegetarians too, but you won't hear them bragging about it on Twitter."

"Before seeing why your toddler has been quiet for 10 mins it's best to first call the plumber and write your apology letter to the landlord."

"What is yellow and smells like red paint? Yellow paint."

"What do you call a short clairvoyant person who just broke out of prison? A small medium at large."

"The difficulty of killing a single bird with one stone has been grossly misjudged."