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Joke of the Day

"Why is it that sumo wrestlers shave their legs? So they don't get mistaken for feminists."

"Did you hear about the man with five dicks? His pants fit like a glove. I'm so sorry. So sorry."

"Jesus walks into a hotel He hands the inn keeper 3 nails and asks, ""Could you put me up for the night?"" Credit to the movie ""The Crow"" Edit: I'm going to hell."

"Ever find buried treasure in your grandpas backyard containing passports, Nazi uniforms, and a photo with Papa with the Fuhrer inside? Yeah."

"My dad got fired for having sex with one of his patients the other day. Which is a shame because he was a really good vet."

"HAPPY APRIL FOOLS GUYS!! I hope I'm not too late. Uploaded with Internet Explorer ."

"I'm not afraid of the Bermuda triangle or any triangle really. Even played at its most aggressive it's just not a threatening instrument."

"""Bro she's a cold digger"" [later with gf] Do you only want me for my germs? [she stops licking my face] Why would you ask that?"

"I became a vegetarian yesterday. I regret it already, I guess you can say it was a missed steak."

"Donald Trump's plan to build a wall might actually work The Chinese built a huge wall, and they have almost no Mexicans in their country."