52154

Joke of the Day

"Ever find buried treasure in your grandpas backyard containing passports, Nazi uniforms, and a photo with Papa with the Fuhrer inside? Yeah."

"Why should you never trust an atom? Because they make up everything."

"If it's 1 or 1000 sins you're still getting sent to Hell. So why not go for 1,000,000 sins and come down here a legend"

"Canada's Gas prices... They fell as fast as Greece's GDP."

"Angry Birds? Hmmph. In my day we had real entertainment. For instance, have you seen the classic film ""The Birds?"" It's about Angry Birds."

"I'm no wine connoisseur, but I do know this bottle of wine pairs perfectly with the bottle I just finished."

"I couldn't find the thingy that peels the carrots and potatoes, so I asked the kids if they'd seen it. Apparently, she left me a few days ago."

"Me: Did you know a cockroach can live for weeks with no head? Him: That's nothing. Husbands sometimes go for years."

"Did you hear about the chickpea freedom fighters? They call themselves Hummas."

"What did the constipated maths teacher do when he got stuck? got a pencil and worked it out."