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Joke of the Day
"My 6 yo just chugged a bottle of water in 30 seconds. Now I'm fearful of her college days."
Next Joke
"Me: Do you love me? 13: Silence Husband: if you don't tell your mother you love her we are going to make out at your next soccer game."
"What do you call it when you said a redneck on fire? A firecracker"
"My editor told me I need to be more pithy, so I booked an appointment with a urologist."
"I think my new dog thinks he is a blacksmith As soon as I took him inside he made a bolt for the door"
"I sing like an amputee. Because I can't hold a note, can't carry a tune.."
"Putin: I have returned Russia to its glory days, once again we have launched a dog into space Reporter: when will it return Putin: WHat"
"I worked a 10-hour day today... Sounds impressive to non-programmers who don't know binary."
"I thought you'd be flattered that my dog found your leg so attractive."
"Where do the gays in New Mexico live? Santa FE GUURLL!!!!"