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Joke of the Day

"HERE'S A KID WITH NO ARMS AND NO LEGS AND HIS PARENTS ARE DEAD AND YOU'LL DIE SOON TOO, BUY THINGS. - Super Bowl Commercials in a nut shell"

"Girl, are you a conspiracy theory? Because I want to listen to you all day long even though I find it hard to believe a word you say."

"Most of my time is spent trying to work ""That's So Raven"" into everyday conversation."

"To the man in the wheelchair at Walmart. You may have stole my camouflage jacket. But just remember, you can hide but you cannot run!"

"Despite all the wars Thailand has been in... They still have been doing a Bangkok job as a country."

"[text] I'm very hungry but I'm sick and tired of the food at my work! ;( Maybe I'll try bringing lunch from home?!"

"Australia beat England in their matchup in the Rugby World Cup. I guess you could say the prisoners beat the guards."

"what did one typewriter say to the other? I must be pregnant ... I missed a period ..."

"What does a stripper eat for thanksgiving dinner? Twerky"

"Hitler was bad. He is going to Heil. get it? heil?"