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Joke of the Day

"Excuse me, but do you like whales? (yeah, why) Cause I was thinking that we could ""humpback"" at my place."

"What's black and white and red all over? A penguin with a rash."

"Went to the doctor's office for my flu shot. He promised it wouldn't hurt... Insensitive prick."

"What kind of cheese did Medusa eat? Gorgon zola."

"Why are giraffe's heads so far away from their bodies? Long necks."

"Customer: This fish isn't as good as what I ordered here last month. Waiter: That's funny. It's from the same fish."

"[airplane intercom] good afternoon ladies and gentlemen this is your captain speaking why did you leave without me"

"Why did the whale cross the road ? To get to the other tide !"

"The original Latin name for Monday was Thisshitagain. #littleknownfacts #alsonottrue"

"Michelle Wolf on A Friend's Pregnancy One of my friends is pregnant. And I'm really excited. Not for the baby but because she's one of my skinniest friends."